Lunch at Miller Manor

Today is the appointed day for our quarterly(ish) lunch with "the girls." I have the distinguished honor of hosting the gathering at Miller Manor this time. We usually meet at a restaurant or at Paula's school and dine together, but we decided the quiet home environment might be nice for a change. This time the celebration will be Dona's birthday. (Each birthday falls in a different quarter, so we try to meet close to a birthday each time. We have failed miserably so far this year!)

Rumor has it we will be discussing the possibility of a Christmas ornament exchange. We've all done cookies for years, but with our wheat free diet, it isn't wise for me to participate in the cookie exchange any more. The festive gathering, the exchange of creativity and the special bond we form during the few hours we take out of the busiest time of the year is the highlight of the holiday season for many of us, so I am glad we have decided on an alternative to the fattening and unhealthy cookie exchange.

It may seem too early to begin planning this event, but in the past we have had twelve participants, and if we have to make 12 ornaments, and if they are very elaborate, they will take some time. Paula teaches throughout the school year, and would not have time to craft other than during the summer months, and personally, I will need a few months to come up with an idea! I'm telling you, these girls are some serious crafters. You may remember the beaded cross-stitched ornaments Dona gave last year, or the little cake plate with miniature cookies on it I shared in a previous post. The pressure is mounting already! Since my favorite medium is paper, I am not so sure I am a good candidate for the group, but I'll give it a whirl.

Lunch will be a combined effort featuring Mango Salsa Chicken and fixin's for either nachos or taco salad. Dona is bringing Lemon Bars and if I get my act together, I will also have a fresh fruit salad. I have pretty much everything done except for planting my flowers, and I plan to do that this morning before they arrive. It's not essential that it gets done, but company is always a good motivator!

Thursday Thirteen #32: Am I a Hippie?

At some point in a person's life, supposedly they revert back to their youth. I was thinking that came after senility, but lately as I have considered the lifestyle changes we've made and their resemblance to the sixties and seventies, I have begun to wonder if I haven't already de-matured.

hip·pie also hip·py (hp)

n. pl. hip·pies

A person who opposes and rejects many of the conventional standards and customs of society, especially one who advocates extreme liberalism in sociopolitical attitudes and lifestyles.

Here are 13 Reasons I Might Be Considered a Hippie

1. I use hemp. No, I don't smoke it, but I have discovered the wonderful flavor and health benefits of hemp milk and nuts. Yum. I also eat a lot of other "weird" foods.
   
2. My bedroom walls are painted avocado green, the guest room is dark brown, and the hall is harvest gold. All that is missing is the rust... This is more of a seventies color scheme, but I think it's pretty funny that the colors I hated back then play a rather significant role in my decor today!
   
3. Natural Fibers. The closer to nature I can get it, the better.
   
4. Bright colors. I haven't gone all tie-die or anything, but I do love bright colors and funky flower designs. I could completely surround myself with floral designs and bright wild decor if not for a certain conservative husband...
   
5. Conservation minded. If I recall correctly, the beginning of the tree-hugger revolution was in the sixties. I'm not so radical that I think we should kill off all the people so the trees and animals can survive, but I am in favor of responsible living and leaving a smaller carbon footprint.
   
6. Diversity in music styles. I can enjoy hard rock and easy listening--both of which were popular in the sixties and seventies.
7. Bare feet. Always my preference, but until the sixties there was no need for "Shirt and shoes required" signs.
   
8. I could SO be a bra burner. I'm just sayin'
9. Going against the flow. While I wouldn't consider myself a liberal, politically speaking, I certainly am not in step with mainstream thinkers of the day. I mean, how many people do you know who adamantly oppose the routine use of doctors and pharmaceuticals?
10. I'm growing my hair long. It was not cool to have short hair back in the sixties. I hated my pixie hair cut, and by sixth grade my goal was to have hair to my waist. That would have been cool had it not been such a pain to care for. I never made it much past my shoulders. This year I decided I was ready to have it long again--at least one more time.
    
11. I love the look of long flowing clothes and dangly earrings. I would love to own a pair of palazzo pants again, and some of the long flowing skirts popular back in the day. We called them maxi skirts, as opposed to mini's or midi's. And, do they still make those old water buffalo sandals? They had a loop for the big toe and when you first got them, they told you to soak them overnight, put them on wet, and let them dry on your feet for a perfect fit. I wore out a lot of those in the seventies!
    
12. Simplicity. The desire to revert back to a simpler life seemed to be a lot of the push behind the revolution. Less government and societal control, more freedom to live as you like. While I think some of that would be nice, it would only work well within the framework of a moral society. Getting out of debt, looking at building a sustainable home and growing our own food in as much as we are able are all steps we are taking toward that lifestyle.
    
13. Jesus freak. Do you remember the Jesus people? I got saved in a church called the Jesus Chapel. The pastor wore a beard and shoulder length hair, and preached a pretty radical message. We all wore jeans and t-shirts to church, worshiped with a guitar and tambourine, and learned about the love of God as evidenced through the sacrifice of Jesus. It may not have been that radical to some, but to a Southern Baptist it was sure different! In the last year or so, I have come back around to that first love and become fairly radical in my beliefs, once again bucking the mainstream of religious thought and taking the Bible at face value instead of basing my life on religious traditions.

When I told Ornery what my topic was going to be this week he added, "And sometimes I go all day without bathing." Oh, what a mess he is! To be sure there are plenty of facets of the era I would not want to adopt, but I just thought it was funny to think about how many of my roots are showing!

THE PURPOSE BEHIND THE THURSDAY THIRTEEN:
The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. What do you do? Write Thirteen things about yourself, summarize your week in one entry, make it easy for other bloggers to get to know you on a weekly basis. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! For more TT participants, go here!

Garden Update

Before I killed it all off, I thought I ought to give you a little update on the progress of our gardening attempts. My track record isn't so very good when it comes to keeping things alive in the heat of the summer, despite my strong starts! Since we will be traveling during July, which is when it will really need some TLC, it likely won't be very happy by August.

The herbs are very happy in their little bed in the back yard. The chive seeds I planted have not come up yet, nor have the echinacea seeds I planted in a pot. They are several years old, so I am not surprised they have not germinated yet, and they may not ever, but I thought I'd give it a try. I discovered them when I was cleaning out the kitchen drawers for our garage sale last month.

However, the rest of the little plants are doing great. The tomato plant has numerous blooms as well as little green tomatoes on it, and the cilantro, which is the only herb I have harvested so far this year, is quite large. I may have been over zealous planting two plants of it! The dill has trebled in size, the basil looks a little anemic, but is still growing. The oregano is the only one that hasn't done much. Lasagna is on the menu this week, so I plan to harvest a bit of basil and oregano to put in the sauce. If I had already a good crop of tomatoes, I would make the sauce from scratch, but that will need to wait until later in the season.

Monday when I went to Whole Foods, I picked up a sage plant. Supposedly sage helps to maintain and restore your original hair color. I'll have to experiment with it to see what I can concoct to meet our finicky palates. I need to get it planted first, though...

While I was watering Tuesday evening, I was amazed at the size of some of the plants on the side of the house. I nearly missed the peonies, which are fairly well past, but still have a few massive blooms on them. Some of the plants had barely any blooms this year since the dogwood tree has grown so large as to shade them excessively. The hydrangea, which once about ten years ago was a six-inch little potted plant, is truly an amazing bush, at least eight feet across, five feet tall, and six feet or more deep. It is loaded with buds, so we should have quite a show in a month or so. It has completely covered the day lily plant, and is almost to overtake the hollyhocks. As happy as it is over there, I am wondering about moving the rest of the stuff and just planting hydrangeas all along that side.

Meanwhile I just purchased a lovely double purple columbine, different from any I had ever seen, and a coleus to fill in the back corner of that bed. There is already a hosta and an astilbe, but there is quite a bit of area that tends to get weedy if there isn't something intentional planted there. I also have impatiens to plant in the front, down by the mailbox beneath the redbuds, and across the front of the house. I'm sure I don't have enough to fill it all in, but it will have to do for this year.

Other transplants are doing fairly well, too. The coral bells plant is now in its third and final resting spot. I finally found a place it is happy! I have volunteer yellow violas all over the yard, but they are so cheery I hate to pull them out. The grape plant, which is at least four years old and has never done more than put on about 12 leaves, is now in a larger pot on the patio, which should remind me to water it more. It is also going to get much more sun than in its previous home, so that might help it. I don't know if I can expect success growing it in a container, but there isn't really a good spot in the yard to plant it, either.

It seems we are done with spring, and are now into summer full force. The highs all week are forecast for in the low 90's, and while it seems a little early for it to be so toasty, I think it is pretty normal. How is your garden this year?

How to Stop the Pain

I have mentioned before that Ornery and I have been trying to read a chapter or two out of a self-help type book each evening after dinner. We have finished two books so far, and are now working on our third. This one is another by Dr. James B Richards called "How to Stop the Pain." The subtitle is "Pain is Inevitable, Suffering is optional."

Here are some quotes from the book that I have found particularly helpful.

(from the intro on p. 12)

In Scripture, Jesus does not say very much about the person who offends us. Instead, He emphasizes that we are to "watch out" when offenses come. When offenses come, we are at far more risk than the person who committed the offense. It is true that the offender's crime is clear and blatant; it is often hard to justify. But it is easy for us to justify all manner of self-destructive behavior simply by the fact that we have been offended. Nonetheless, even though we are victims, we are still subject to the same life principles. The rules for peace and happiness do not change simply because we can now justify unacceptable behavior.

We all have a choice as to how we will handle offenses. Not only do we have the choice, but it is our responsibility to determine whether or not the offense will affect us adversely. Richards then goes on to lay the foundation for freedom from the pain.

from Chapter 1, p. 15-16)

In daily life, as well as in business, people experience pain and failure while trying very hard to be happy. For some, this begins their mystical search to please God and somehow obtain the blessings that are described in His Word. Their journey is one of legalism, dead works, self-absorption and frustration. You see, there is not a single thing we can do to get God to violate or deny the finished work of Jesus. The Scriptures are quite clear that we have everything that pertains to life and godliness through Jesus. (2 Peter 1:3)

In order of God to even consider blessing us as a result of our efforts, He would have to completely deny the finished work of His Son. ... The starting place for the pathway out of pain and into sanity is always remind ourselves of the truth: We are accepted in Jesus. We are righteous through Him. We are free from every curse of the law because we are in Him. We are qualified for every aspect of the inheritance through Him. And every promise God has ever made to anyone is "yes" because we are in Him. (2 Corinthians 1:20)

This concept is foreign to most Christians. It was foreign to me until just over a year ago. What does he mean, God won't bless me for my efforts??? It means that when I have accepted Christ, all God sees is the righteousness of Jesus covering me. I no longer exist as a separate entity, so when God looks at me, He sees Jesus. Does this mean I no longer do good works? No. I am compelled to do good works out of love, and because that is my calling but I do not do them to earn God's favor.

For our part of getting rid of the pain, we are told to get to the root of the problem, which is judgment.

(from chapter 2, page 19)

The Sermon on the Mount contains some of the most dynamic personal teachings of Jesus. It is here that we find one of the most important critical factors for emotional health and happiness. "Do not judge, or you too will be judged. For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you." (Matthew 7:1-2 NIV)

For centuries, we have missed the meaning and scope of this simple yet powerful passage. We have interpreted these verses to say, "If I judge other people, God is going to judge me." That is not what this passage says. It says that if we judge people, people will judge us.

Another interesting point he makes refers to the parallel passage in Luke 6:38 which says "Give and it shall be given unto you; good measure, pressed down, and shaken together, and running over, shall men give into your bosom." He points out that while this has traditionally been applied to finances, it primarily refers to what we give to others emotionally based on the two preceding verses.

I was wondering exactly what the term judge means; he says this:

Identifying what someone did is not judgment; that is merely observation. It is when we assume to know why a person did what he did that we have entered into judgment.

He goes on later to add,

The moment you attempt to determine why another is doing what he or she is doing, you have given it significance. Keep in mind that nothing has the power to hurt you until you attach significance to it. ... The degree of pain or insult you experience from the actions of another is based solely on the judgment you pass. And the judgment you pass is your assumption of why he did what he did.

OK. Now he is getting personal.

I can't tell you the number of times I have asked my kids "why did you do that?" or worse, decided based on my own past experience why they chose that destructive behavior or unhealthy option. Later he talks about control and how when we attempt to control the outcome of someone else's behavior, we elevate ourselves to the position of God in their life. Here was a very painful revelatory passage from last night's reading:

To be blunt, control is a form of witchcraft. Paul told the Galatian believers that they had been bewitched (Galatians 3:1) They had been brought under the control of the Judaizers. Of course, the Judaizers had justification for their control. In their minds, they were acting on behalf of God. The problem is, God never uses control to accomplish His will in the earth. He works through the hearts of people. He leads and instructs us as the children He loves. If control was God's method, He could solve the world's problems in one decisive act.

If God had not already been working in my heart about my controlling ways, and I had read that passage "cold turkey" I would have been MAD!!! But, it is true. God has given us all a free choice, and I don't read anywhere in His word that He took it back or passed it on to me! I always have screwed things up when I take the reins. What a peace and freedom I have felt by allowing God to do His job, and being grateful to Him that I don't have to anymore!

We've only made it about 1/3 of the way through this book, and it is going slowly because we discuss each chapter and compare our thoughts. I am rejoicing that when I read things like this I (finally) no longer think, "So and so could really use this message." Instead I see where God is working in my own heart to bring about the changes that will draw me to a deeper abiding relationship with Him, and a healthy loving relationship with others.

If you are having relationship pain, you can order this book from Impact Ministries. I don't know if it is available elsewhere, but you can order it from them.

Monday Morning

I wish I could carry the zeal I have on Monday all the way through until Friday!

This morning I shocked Ornery by getting up with him, showering, getting dressed, fixing breakfast, washing the dishes and making a list for the day before he left for work. I know he was amazed because he commented on it. Several times. Actually, I was a bit amazed myself. I guess the success of the weekend buoyed me up!

They say that the more you do the more you feel like doing. Well, they weren't in poor physical condition and out working in the yard all day Saturday. All I wanted to do was die on Sunday! The backs of my legs still scream when I bend over, but they are a little better today than yesterday. It's a good thing they are better, because I will be bending over to plant the flowers I bought.

Today is our 29th wedding anniversary. We celebrated yesterday afternoon with lunch at Taco Bueno and then Braums ice cream sundaes at home. Ornery gave me my card, and I made his after I cleaned up the craft room from the wedding album mess. It may not sound very romantic to have lunch at Taco Bueno, but we agreed we didn't want to do anything expensive, and you can't get much cheaper than that! :-)

I told him we should go to Burger King to celebrate, since that was our first off campus date. They used to send coupons to the ORU dorms and we would take them and "buy one get one free" whoppers. BK is about the only restaurant left that was around when we were dating. They have all changed hands or been bought (or run) out by chains. He proposed to me at Sleepy Hollow, we celebrated many birthdays and anniversaries at Italian Inn and Ursula's Bavarian Inn, and we loved going to Chicken, Steak and Chocolate Cake for a fun evening of really good food. The very best pizza we ever had was at J. Paul Spaghetti's and we spent hours and hours and hours at a little place called J. P. Sousa's playing cards and visiting over nachos.

Most of those places have been gone for over 25 years, but we still remember the fun times, the laughter, and the good food -- which probably tasted better with the first bloom of love! Twenty-nine years of memories, dreams, romance and shared experiences have only drawn us closer together. It is the best thing in my world being married to a Godly man who also happens to be my best friend.

Menu Plans Moved

Just a reminder that Menu Plan Monday has moved to Recipes from Miller Manor. In case you were wondering...

Knowledge vs. Experience

This week I have been in dialog with another blogger about religion. He approaches God from a theoretical perspective, trying to base his beliefs on his ability to ask questions and formulate his own theology based on his observations and the answers he gets. While he seems to be a very educated man and very astute in a wide variety of topics, he does not appear to have any interest (that I can tell from our dialog), in actually experiencing a relationship with God. Throughout his writings, he never really says God, but discourses about religion. It has been an interesting dialog!

While listening to a sermon earlier this week, the speaker made an excellent analogy about knowledge versus experience using the example of the wind. A person can study wind, hear about wind, listen to it, observe the good or damage it produces, project the path, measure the speed, and have all sorts of knowledge about the wind, but until he actually feels the wind, it will not cool him off. Until it fills his sails, it will not move him.

I think you could use any number of examples to say the same thing--only by getting into the water will you ever know what it means to be wet, etc.

Life in Christ is like feeling the wind as opposed to just knowing about it. It is like being immersed in and feeling the movement of the water swirling around you, or quenching your thirst and offering refreshment. Studying and knowing about God will only lead you so far, but taking the leap of faith and inviting Him into your heart gives new life.

Saturday's "Done" List

What a productive weekend we've had and it is only half over! Here is what we have accomplished so far:

1. Finished the wedding album!
2. Cleaned out two flower beds in the back yard
3. Moved all the stepping stones to one place by the patio
4. Moved dirt to fill in the flower bed that is going to be filled with stepping stones to increase the size of the patio.
5. Trimmed five trees
6. Bought flowers for the front beds, and lots of other stuff from Lowe's for our "fix-it-up-to-sell" projects
7. Cleaned weeds, roots and leaves out of the lawn
8. Upset numerous varieties of wildlife, including a toad, a snake, lots of earthworms, roaches, spiders and millipedes.

We are ready for a nap.

(edited Sunday to add: we can barely move! Ornery says I have computer legs--you know no muscle tone from sitting at the computer all day. He is only slightly better off than I am today~)

Happy Friday!

In my mind all day yesterday was Friday. Even last night when Ornery and I went out to dinner and the store, I was thinking, "There sure isn't much activity on 71st St. for a Friday night!" When I said it aloud, Ornery told me that it likely didn't look like Friday night because it was not Friday night. Oops!
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So the comments yesterday got me thinking about writing. When two published authors say I could do it, that gives me encouragement. I have often thought I'd like to write, but deciding on a topic or genre is always the sticking point. Do I want to write fiction or non-fiction? Self-help? Inspiration? Funny things? Kids books? The seed has been planted and the brain storming has begun.
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We have had some hilarious gigglefests here at Miller Manor lately. Yesterday's was prompted by a series of photos of actual signs in China that had been loosely translated into English, some of which were side-splitting! The photos themselves were funny, but the comments were the icing on the proverbial cake. I thought about posting them, but I would hate to offend anyone. So if you want me to email them to you, just leave me a comment or email me.
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I will be doing laundry and scrapbooking today. Since they both take place in the same room, I am hopeful that the laundry will actually get finished! I am glad the plumbing woes are over, and that I won't have to be hopping up with each load as it drains to keep it from overflowing. What a mess that was! I am very grateful now that it is fixed!

The other task that needs doing is to renew the car tag. What a nuisance that is! Hunt down the extra copy of the insurance verification, go to the tag agent and wait in line FOREVER, pay the extra dollar for postage (what's up with that?) when you could wait an additional ten to fifteen minutes and they could hand the registration to you.

This time I am also going to have to fill out paperwork to switch over the vehicle that displays the ONERY vanity plate, since we are getting rid of the pickup next week. I don't think we will renew it when it comes due in February, but since we've already paid for it, we'll display it proudly (?) until it expires. We will look like serious contenders in the road rage wars, with 'SCRAPPR' on the front and 'ONERY' on the back.
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Lots of weekend warrior tasks on the board for tomorrow, mostly featuring outdoor fun like moving cement stepping stones and a bunch of those stacking ornamental blocks, shoveling dirt and moving it to another bed across the yard, replacing fence posts and weeding. We should be sore and crispy by the end of the weekend!

So, happy Friday! (It really is Friday today, isn't it?)